Angle Grinder Soup

Hi, folks!

Here's a lighthearted start with a dash of whimsy

To make Angle Grinder Soup, one must first source and select an angle grinder. I've tried making this recipe several times, and find that sourcing your grinders from Oilybaby or Horrible Fright yields a questionable quality soup in the end. Not always enough bite, and things might break up in weird ways.
You'll need to determine the power of your grinder by rolling it onto its back and looking carefully. Some of them are plug-ins, while others like battery packs plugged in. The flavor comes down to personal preference; I prefer the bold taste of mains-powered grinders.

Take one large angle grinder, break it up into large pieces (use a sledgehammer to get through the tough carapace), and add it to a stock pot with 1.5 gallons of water and half a teaspoon of salt. Bring to a rolling boil, then reduce the heat to a simmer.

To this, add one large diced red onion; one pound of chopped carrots; a single celery stalk, diced; two teaspoons of Penzey's Justice; and one star anise. Add more hot water if vegetables aren't submersed at this point.

Let it cook until the angle grinder is tender.

Serves 0; why are you eating an angle grinder? :)

Speaking of why are you eating that!?, let's talk about...

Food and Prisons

So I am of an understanding that prison is a punishment, and I agree that punishments should be meted fairly.
Where I may differ with the vehicle of punishment is how much of it is fair, and when do we cross over into inappropriate territory.

I am absolutely not saying we deserve gourmet fare for every meal; what would be reasonable, however, is to have our food handled with respect and care.

Meal trays should be properly cleaned and not reeking of a fecal matter-like odor from 3 meters away.

Food should be appropriately cooked so that it does not lose its texture (e.g.: noodles that turn to paste when you touch them), but isn't so consistently undercooked that hard food pieces do damage to dental work (e.g.: uncooked or undercooked beans).

For inmates at a callout when their meal tray arrives to the dorm, their trays should never be stacked on the bare floor for holding.

Our punishment is penance, our time in and away from those we love and care about. Our punishment isn't to be treated as anything less than human.

Believe it or not, my sentence didn't come with a dehumanization clause. Whether it's true or a rack of bogus charges that landed a person in prison, start at human. If the person acts subhuman, try to build them back better than their now.

Give us our new now, and let us show you our improvements.

• To you who read this this day, this is your new now.
• Learn from your thens, but dwell not in them, for they are immutable.
• Give others this same courtesy as you yourself also deserve.

Be good to yourselves, to each other, and remember that we are a community that spans the globe. Take care, and thanks for reading.

:)